Bruised Pride and Missing Teeth

      One of my Uncle Antonio’s favorite hobbies, besides drinking and womanizing, was getting into fights. He loved to fight so much that he would often instigate them. Although he was a bully, he was not your typical bully. Ninety-eight percent of all bullies are cowards, and Uncle Antonio was anything but. Most cowards like to prey upon people that they believe are weaker than them. My uncle loved the challenge of taking on a guy with a rep; he loved the uncertainty of who was top dog going into the fight. 

      It was this characteristic that was to prove his undoing. In one such instance, he tried to goad a guy with the reputation of being one bad motherfucker. This guy would not take the bait. He had a reputation as someone who would not fight unless in defense of a friend or if he was attacked. His admirers claimed that once aroused he was unbeatable. Urban legend has it that my uncle kept goading him until his failure to provoke the guy drove him mad, and he drew first blood. My Uncle beat-up the guy so badly that he put him in the hospital for an unhealthy length of time.

      A year later, motivated by the humiliation of an unprovoked beating, and his need for vengeance, the guy enlisted the help of several buddies and took his revenge. They waited behind the tavern one night, and as my Uncle was leaving, stumbling from excess drink, they jumped him. Each of them was armed with brass knuckles, and vengeance was theirs.

      They beat my Uncle unmercifully, breaking many ribs, cracking his skull, shattering his jawbone, and knocking out all of his teeth. For many months my Uncle had to suck his food through a straw because his entire jaw had been wired shut. After that, he wore dentures to replace the mouthful of teeth he lost in the beating, and although he still did not like to back down from a fight, his jets had been cooled enough that he rarely provoked trouble (for the most part).