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EXCERPT FROM THE BOOK:
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT
- One Primate's Search For Intelligent Life
You Haven’t Reached
Puberty Kid!
Every year my family would take us kids to the Eagleville Fair.
As a kid it was fun. As a teenage primate it was prime hunting
grounds. Teenage primates would go there to practice mating
rituals. First the hunt, and then the primate displays of their
individual prowess. This year we decided to go to the tent where
they showed erotic dancers. You had to be eighteen and older. I
was fifteen years old, my friends were older and we all managed
to get in to see the girls. Of course I managed to force my way
to the front. It was standing room only, no seats.
The girls would come out and one of them invited me to… touch
her. In fact, since I had pushed my way eagerly right up to the
stage, the beautiful dark haired hazel-eyed dancer pulled my
face into the nether regions between her legs. I eagerly kept my
face there and made like a pig at the trough as I snorted in her
intoxicating pheromones; and why not? After all, Honey had
taught me that pussy had nutritional value. I was just like an
excited colt just dropped from a mare’s womb; with my legs and
flanks shaking and a quivering as I licked and sucked this
beautiful woman’s pussy. Her pussy tasted almost as good as
Honey’s.
(I
would eventually learn that not all pussy tastes good, and in
fact some can be unpalatable).
Outside my younger brother James was trying to get in. James was
only eleven. The security guys outside where laughing as they
pushed my brother away.
They told him, “Get out of here kid, you haven’t even reached
puberty yet!”
James was yelling, “Come on, I’m eighteen years old damn it!”
I think my brother James and I got that time of aggressiveness
from our biological father. Even at 74 years of age, sex is all
that my dad thinks about. James actually had sex for his first
time a year younger than I had (he was eleven his first time),
and our father was initiated four years younger than my brother.
Back then I was so determined and shameless I used every line
from the book, “The Sensuous Man”.
A lot of people, especially people that have never been a
teenage boy battling the affliction of overpowering lust, just
don’t understand why a young boy like me would be in a tent with
strange women snuffling in her feminine delights.
They just cannot understand that that our drives are often times
pesky as hell. They don’t understand that our Johnson is
practically impossible to ignore, that we are slaves depended on
our hormonal secretions; that our hormones do affect our
emotions and ultimately our behavior.
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