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EXCERPT FROM THE BOOK:
VINCE'S GYM
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
The Redneck Has
His Dog and Pony Show
We settled in to watch some of the inspiring lifters go
through their paces. On my left
was a stocky guy cheering his oldest son as his boy was performing a pretty good
squat.
I noticed that he had his hand wrapped around a brown bag with a
40 oz. bottle of beer and guzzling it as eagerly as a dying man
rescued from death valley. On a bleacher step below him and to
his left was a large red and white dirt stained
cooler. I wondered how many
more 40 ouncers were stocked within. With every chug, beer
consistently dribble down unshaven face.
He was a big beefy guy
and very much overweight.
He had
tiny close set piggish
eyes and a red bulbous nose set floating in an alcohol ruined
face. He looked like every red-neck in every Burt Reynold's
movie.
Sitting on a bleacher to his right and my left and one below us
was the rednecks younger son. I estimated his younger son was about fourteen years old
and small for his age. Although small, he had a very well
knit frame, much like many gymnasts light-weight boxers or
wrestlers often have.
His youngest son was a good looking kid and as he matured, very
likely to
break more than his fair
share of hearts. The boozer's son was also very artistic. He had a large
sketch pad and was rendering excellent charcoal sketches
of many of the lifters, seemingly in minutes for each sketch.
It tugged at my heartstrings as I watched the kid try his best to get his dad’s attention and approval
each time he finished one sketch and then another after each was
completed.
It was
evident that his father could care less about his younger son’s talent;
and in fact made many despairing remarks... calling his son's drawings
- artsy farsy sissy stuff.
The hick belched, made a half-hearted attempt to wipe his mouth
with a dirty flannel sleeve, “Hell boy, what don’t ya start
going out for football like your bother? You could be lifting weights with
him and start working on putting some real meat on your frame instead of
wasting your time with that sissy stuff.”
Of course the response from his father triggered issues that I
had carried with me my entire life, issues that I had with my
own father and my schoolmates. I purposely looked over the kid's
shoulder to openly appraise several drawings he rendered of his brother and many of the
other lifters.
The kid was in the process of sketching Neo.
I
thought his talent was amazing, “Wow!!” “Those
drawings are really cool.”
I looked at both the kid and the father,
"I use to
draw a lot, I love it, but I lost the knack for it.”
The father said, “Yeah but now you do what men do, there comes a
time when a child needs to put down dolls or put down the sissy
stuff and take up the man stuff!”
As focused on his drinker's face I pondered on how best to
neutralize his disdain for his younger son. I was hesitant,
because quite frankly, I was a little fearful of him.
He was a big cuss,
and overweight boozer or not, he still looked dangerous.
However, despite being the consummate compassionate stubborn
coward, I jacked up my nerve. I became a rush of words before I
lost my nerve, “I still love to draw and if I had more time I would
pick it up again.” “I don’t think it is sissy stuff, -- hell
Picasso was quite the athlete and a ladies man.”
I was trying to get it through his besotted brain that his
youngest son would be able to do all
of the man things that he felt was so important.
He simply grunted and fixed me with sow eyes.”
The red neck’s older son just completed his first squat and he
came over to the bleachers to get a fresh set of knee wraps from
his father. He was a handsome seventeen years old and a junior
or senior in high school. He was not quite five foot ten inches
in height and he was competing in the 181 pound teenage class.
He was quite strong for his frame and age and shown great
potential. His father just gushed over his son like the owner of
a fine thoroughbred horse and of course a valued extension of
himself. You could tell that the kid was pleased somewhat from
the attention that he got from his father, but he was also
sensitive of the fact that his younger brother needed and
deserved the same level of attention that his father was
bestowing on him.
The oldest boy I will call Jimbo went over to his younger to
look at the sketches that his younger sibling had been working
on. The oldest brother was really appreciative of the sketches,
and really laid on the affection and attention on his younger
brother.
The kid looked over at his father and said, “Hey dad will you
look at these pictures that Ian did, they're incredible!”
The father just grunts, ‘Yeah real nice.”
The older brother persisted and said, “Ian is going to be world
famous with talent like this.”
Ian glowed from the attention that his brother was giving him.
You could tell that they adored each other.
I also
got the sense that the older brother was glad that his father
was approved of his strength and athletic ability, but you could
also tell that he was doing it mainly for himself, and he also
seemed to realize that in the grand scheme of things in the
Universe power lifting and football was just a enjoyable
distraction, nothing more. I was very moved to see the maturity
and the depth of concern and feeling that this kid had for his
younger brother.
The older brother took the sketches and put them in front of his
father’s nose and said, “Isn’t this great dad?”
His father said, “Yeah, yeah, it’s nice.” Hey that was a great
lift you did, the red-neck gushed, you’re going to kick
everyone’s butt.”
He said, “You keep it up and you’ll be in the big time once you
make the football team in college.”
The older son said, “Ah dad, football is fun, but I’m putting
most of my eggs in the psychology basket.”
His father said, ‘Psychology, aw no... football is your
calling!”
The kid said, ‘Well talk later dad, I got another squat to do,
they just called my name up on deck, got to go, and he winks at
his younger brother.
The guy looks down at his son going for another squat, and he
starts cheering for his son.” That’s my son he screamed, he’s a
chip off the ole block he is!” We all cheered the kid on as he
was coming out of the hole to finish up.
Neo who had not spoken a word to the guy slides over to close
the gap that had been between them since I moved to check out
the boys sketches.
Neo yells like a redneck banshee, “Yeee haaa!”
He
slaps the big fella on the back and looks over at him with a
funny inbred look to his face.
Neo says in a perfect Mr. Haney on the “Greenacres” TV show
voice, “That sure is a mighty fine prize pig ya got
yerself there!”
The guy was taken back, I guess because no one had ever referred
to the apple of his eye as a prize pig.
The
big fella said, “What did you say?”
Neo said, “You know yer prize pig, yer blue ribbon
special, that boy of yers, is a hellva of a dog and pony show.”
The beefy redneck was confused but was acting as though he may
be the target of a backhanded insult. He said, “What the hell do
you mean by that Mr.!”
Neo was really getting into the carnie hick act and he slaps the
big guy on the back and winks at him in a real conspiratorial
manner.
Before the guy can stop his sputtering Neo keeps up the verbal
barrage, “Ya need to milk him of his sperm ya do, ya got
to get lots of it, so ya can sell it and get him breeding
rights!”
Neo said, “He takes after you don’t he?” “He’s
got them bull stud genes from you don’t he?”
The redneck was mollified by Neo’s seeming to gush about the
redneck producing superior fruit from his besotted loins.
The redneck said, “Well he does get it from me, -- I use to be a
football star back in high school and I have always been very
strong as he flexes his fleshy forearms. He lets out a beer
belch and points at his youngest son, and said, “Ian here takes
after his momma -- she likes all of that artsy fartsy stuff.”
‘He points out at his eldest son and says, “I’m glad that Jimbo
there takes after me.’
Neo said, “Well I can see yer right proud to have a son
that you ken do the dog and pony show thing, that’s certainly
the best way fer people ta see that you both have value.”
The redneck got the look on his face that he might be getting a
backhanded insult again, but he wasn’t quite sure.
Before he could articulate his discomfort, Neo starts jabbering
in that Mr. Haney voice and says, “It be a shame if he
ever gets sick or injured, -- I mean if he ever were to crush an
arm or a leg he be out of the blue ribbon circuit, then you’d
have to put him down of course!”
The redneck father’s jaw dropped and he said, ‘Put him down?”
“What do you mean?”
Neo said, “Ya know, put him to sleep, give him the dirt
nap, bed him with the worms, let him sleep with the fishes, send
him to the great beyond!”
Neo slaps his thigh, and says, “Whooee!” “When
they get ruined, them prize pigs lose their value and then ya
still got to feed them, and who wants to do that when ya ain’t
gettin nutten in return?”
The redneck showing his anger says, “Hey!, what the hell are you
saying?”
Neo said, “I’m saying ya got to protect your showpiece, ya
find that it’s best ta keep him locked up at home, ya know,
don’t let him get that much out of the house to keep him
protected.” “That way he can stay on the blue
ribbon circuit longer, by cutting down on his chances of getten
permanent injuries.”
The redneck said, “I can’t keep him lockup, he’s got to go to
school and do other things.”
Neo said, “Yeah, but if he gits injured then he’ll lose
his value and ya still gotta feed him, that will be a real drain
on ya, right?”
The Redneck said, “Well he could do other stuff to get through
in life, to make a living.”
Neo voice got higher in pitch, and he said, “Well, yeah I
suppose he could, but what would ya get out of that, if he can’t
do physical stuff?” “Ya know, like what you and I
know are the important things in life that men do?”
Neo winks at the redneck.
The Redneck said, “Well maybe I wouldn’t be happy about my son
not becoming a Pro football player, but I sure he could find
some sort of job so he wouldn’t be a burden to me and his
mother.” The redneck continued, “Hell he would have to, because
no kid of mine is going to sponge off of me after he’s eighteen
years old.”
Neo said, “Lordy no, of course not, why in the world would
anyone consider that?” “I mean let’s face it, when a man’s
offspring cannot pull in the blue ribbons, they really have lost
their value, I say get rid of them!”
The Redneck said, “Well I don’t know if they don’t have any
value, they are my children but if they can’t be rich or famous
athlete, then that would be a crying shame and even a little
embarrassing.”
Neo said, “I know what you mean it would be embarrassing
if yer kids didn’t become the high ticket athlete that you hoped
they be!” “Ya know what is in yer genes to be!”
The redneck belches again and says, “fucking-A right brother!”
Neo said, “Well you must be one of them there high level
prooofessional athlete’s huh?” Neo grinned became
broader and he said, “Yer a professional bowler aren’t ya?”
The guy chokes on his beer and sputters, “What?” “Bowler?”
“That’s a sport for old people and wimps!”
Neo looks at the guy with an expression on his face like he just
found out he had been sitting with O.J. Simpson the football
icon, and said, “Oh my Lordy, yer a prooofessional
football player, aren’t ya?”
The redneck appeared to be startled by this remark and he said
not since high school.”
Neo said, “Mm mm mm, you mean you didn’t go into the pros?”
The redneck said, Well I broke my collarbone and then I got my
wife pregnant, and then one thing led to another, and now I got
two boys, so it never happened, … these days I just work for
ODOT.”
Neo said, “It must feel like crap not to have any value.”
The redneck roared, “Hey! I’m as good as anyone else ass wipe!”
The redneck sputters and says, “I pull my own weight!” I work a
job to support myself and my family.” ”There is nothing wrong
with that.” “Being a pro athlete is not everything, you know!!”
Neo looked at the redneck with compassion, and in his normal
voice he said softly, “No there is nothing wrong with that.”
Neo said, “There are other things than pro sports that give a
person value.” “That’s what your boys have already found out for
themselves.” “There is a lot you can learn from both of your
sons, -- I suggest you start with Ian.”
Neo and I Get Some
Refreshments
Neo looks at me and said, “Hey Vinny, lets go and get some
refreshments into both of us before you have to lift.
I asked him, “Why he went out of his way to be rude to the
redneck?”
He said, “Why did you go out of your way to show Ian attention
and appreciation of his work?”
I said, “Because I did not like the way that his father was
treating him, -- like he had no value because he was not a big
time athlete.” “I also wanted to emphasize to the father that
his son had many things that could be appreciated.”
Neo said, “Ditto!”
I said, “Why did you use that funny voice?”
Neo said, “I wanted to keep things light for me, and in a way I
hoped that a part of him would realize that I was showing him
the ignorant and hickish side that he was operating from.”
I said, “Well, I think you got your point across.” “His oldest
son is really a remarkable kid.”
Neo said, “Yes despite his father, he has rare insight and
compassion.” “Mel and the other lifters in your gym are likely
to be the product of fathers like Ian’s. That is why they are
driven to compete in meets that are well below their level of
performance.” “They are like little children who never got the
love, attention and acceptance from their parents that all
children need.” Neo went on, “Believe it or not, what you and
Rock are doing is going to do more to help them than they will
realize.” He said, “Be prepared, because they are going to be
very mad at what you are planning to do.”
I said, “Yeah, I’m sorry, but I got to put out my best effort.”
We get to the refreshment counter and I order some hotdogs
fries. Neo orders the same, which stunned me, because he always
made an effort to eat really healthy.
I mentioned this to him and he said, “Well it is important to
eat healthy, but you can’t be anal about it.”
He laughed and said, “When nothing else is available and if it
doesn’t serve you to go through a fast then when in Rome make
like a Roman.” Neo laughs and pats me on the back and says,
“Let’s get you ready for your squats, you should be up soon.”
I said, “Time for this prize pig to win his blue ribbon.” Neo’s
humor and enthusiasm could be contagious!”
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