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EXCERPT FROM THE BOOK:
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search For
Intelligent Life (EXODUS)
More Tough Choices—I Say No To Love
When I lived at
the Adobe, I met my first love, Lorraine. She was beautiful and
she was sweet. She came from a tough family. When we got
together, the world felt right. Being with her was different
that any of the other women. I felt more that just fondness for
her. I felt linked to her at a cellular lever.
However,
eventually, I did the best I could to drive Lorraine away from
me. It was one of the most painful choices I’ve ever made in my
life. I knew if we continued to be together, she would have
ended up pregnant.
Before Lorraine, I
have always wondered what I might have done if I had ever gotten
a woman pregnant.
I worried down
deep that I would have taken the cowardly route and taken a
greyhound out of town.
With Lorraine,
I knew I could never do that. I would have married her, not only
because it would have been my responsibility to do right by the
child, but also because I really did love her. However, I looked
at that scenario and saw into the future. I was poor and could
barely feed myself despite my best efforts and there was the
likelihood my life would always be the same. I saw it going the
same way as many of the waitresses I worked with at the Holiday
In, a lot of whom were thirty to fifty-something, whining every
night of how they had gotten pregnant at an early age and how
they and their husbands had to struggle and suffer to raise
their families. They seemed trapped and they certainly felt that
way.
I could bear
the thought of being poor and in love, but couldn’t bear the
thought that Lorraine would eventually learn to despise me. I
could not bear the thought of having a family ripped away from
me.
So with an
aching heart, I told her I wanted out of the relationship.
Breaking up with her may have been the best thing to do, but I
was in a blue funk for years afterwards. I know she thought I
wanted to play the field and was breaking up with her for that
reason. It broke my heart to see her hurt, to believe I didn’t
want her. Years later, when I worked in the government sector,
I tried to track her
down and ask her to be with me.
I never found her
until years later. She was already spoken for.
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search For Intelligent Life
(GENESIS)
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search For Intelligent Life
(REVELATIONS)
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search For Intelligent Life
(JUDGMENT DAY)
THE MARINES: GOD'S CHOSEN
WARRIORS
VINCE'S GYM
ADVENTURES IN MARINE BIOLOGY
CONVERSATIONS WITH NEO
NEO TEACHES ME THE ART OF WAR
& PEACE;
His Version of The Matrix
MEMORIES OF MY FATHERS
ZEN & THE ART OF RESISTANCE
TRAINING:
A Yogic & Scientific Approach To Weight
Lifting
ZEN & THE BIOLOGY OF
TRANSCENDENCE:
The First Matrix of Psychic
Phenomena
ZEN & THE ART OF KINESIOLOGY:
The Yogic & Scientific
Approach To Movement
ZEN & YOUR ENERGY SYSTEMS
ZEN & VARIOUS ASPECTS OF
TRAINING
HOMEPAGE TO MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search For Intelligent Life
(EXODUS)
HOMEPAGE |
